I sleep, but my heart is awake; it is the voice of my beloved! He knocks, saying, “Open for me…” Song of Songs 5:2
Picture yourself. In doing so, you immediately imagine the person you see in the mirror each day. We know that exterior person pretty well, don’t we? We know the moles on our faces, the cowlicks in our hair, the flaws we hate, and the assets we preen. We are exterior people. We spend money - a lot of it - on purchases that will make us physically comfortable or enhance our exterior selves. Now - imagine your interior self. That deep-down part of yourself that God created with a yearning for Him. There are many layers to our interior; it’s complex; it’s not as easy to evaluate. Do you know the condition of your interior? Do you know the hurts that have been buried for years? Do you know why you react the way you do? Are you familiar with the scars sin has caused? Can you say with certainty that your interior is healthy and beautiful? There is a mirror that will offer the reflection you need to discover the condition of your interior self: solitude with God; silence in His presence. It’s amazing what regular periods of silence do for our souls. Sometimes it’s shocking to finally take time to assess the part of us we neglect the most. Silence, “far from the madding crowd,” is a spiritual necessity to allow God to show us the wounds He wants to heal, the motivations He wants to reveal, the fears He wants to soothe, the scars He wants to make beautiful.
Pray Psalm 139:1-7, 13-18, 23-24:
O Lord, You have searched me and known me.
My frame was not hidden from You,
You know my sitting down and my rising up;
When I was made in secret,
You understand my thought afar off.
And skillfully wrought in the lowest parts
You comprehend my path and my lying down, of the earth.
And are acquainted with all my ways.
Your eyes saw my substance, being
For there is not a word on my tongue, yet unformed.
But behold, O Lord, You know it altogether.
And in Your book they all were written,
You have hedged me behind and before,
The days fashioned for me,
And laid Your hand upon me.
Where there were yet none of them.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;
How precious also are Your thoughts
It is high, I cannot attain it.
to me, O God!
Where can I go from Your Spirit?
How great is the sum of them!
Or where can I flee from Your presence?
If I should count them, they would be
more than the sand;
For You formed my inward parts;
When I awake, I am still with You.
You covered me in my mother’s womb.
Search me, O God, and know my heart;
I will praise You, for I am fearfully and Try me, and know my anxieties;
And see if there is any wicked way in me,
Marvelous are Your works,
And lead me in the way everlasting.
And that my soul knows very well.